Posts tagged “humor

The Chicago Junior Astronomer’s Field Guide to the Night Sky

 

We all feel a sense of limitless wonder when gazing into the eternity of the night sky. But what are the myriad celestial objects to be seen high above our fair city? This handy guide will list them all, as seen in the photograph below from left to right.
1) Lens flare.
2) Venus.
3) Dust on camera sensor.

Now, with the encyclopedic knowledge of the heavens at your fingertips, you’ll be able to amaze your friends on clear evenings. Won’t they be jealous! Who knows, you might even “catch the eye” of the lissome neighbor girl you’ve been ogling lately. What are you thinking? She doesn’t like stupid stars! She like Arnold, the rowing team captain. He’s got everything… muscles; a crew neck sweater from his uncle in Portugal; they say he’s even going to get his own car next year. You are so lame, and the neighbor girl knows it. To think you had a shot with her! What folly! Gee, you should just get beat. Nobody cares about your stars.

 

OhioStreetFeeder.wp

 


The March of the Overhead Projectors

 

Three overhead projectors (superimposa lumerarium) as seen traversing an icy plateau. The lead has called a momentary halt to the march as it turns to investigate the origin of some suspicious noises. The projectors have much to fear; almost extinct, they are easy prey for many scholastic predators.

 

Hark!

Procession.


The Gothiest Thing That Ever Did Goth

There is a cemetery just across the tracks to the west of the Packard plant, something which is often overlooked both literally and figuratively. Having consumed many Reese’s confections as a child and possessing the superior artistic acumen that comes with having a blog, I quickly descried two great things that go great together. Should I be accused of being maudlin, or of laying it on too thick, I will gladly stand those slings and arrows to bring you this, the photograph that goes to eleven. Ladies and gentlemen, kids in lycra capes and cheap eyeliner, I give you: gravestones as seen from inside a ruined factory.

 

 

PackardCemeteryHDR.wp

Gravescape.

 


Boiler Room

Afternoon light filters through a factory boiler room, Gary, Indiana.

BoilerRoomHDR2.wp

Boiler Room

 

The bright light and overall cheerful color palette made me want to turn this into a retro-style greeting card.

BoilerRoomHDR2.wpPOSTCARD

Postcard.

 

Clearly, graphic designers need not fear for their jobs.


Hello

Oh… hi.
I didn’t think I’d run into you here.
You followed me?
We can’t just keep meeting like this.It isn’t healthy.
You know that I’m trying… to be rid of you.
But, since we’re here…
You can sit on me.  Just for a minute.
That’s it. Use my armrests, make yourself really comfortable.
Lean back?
That’s it.
Just like we used to.
Right, baby?
Just do one more thing. Just one little thing for me, baby.
Swivel me, baby?
Swivel.

 

HallChair.wp

Suddenly, Chair.

 

Shot at the same church as previous several posts, so not a completely random non sequitur.


Levity

The sensitive and attentive reader might well be forgiven for thinking the authors of this blog somewhat ponderous, skulking across blasted urban ruinscapes with our brows permanently knotted in a scowl, we are known to laugh on occasion. The decay we we photograph comes inevitably with time, but it is helped along in good measure by vandals. These are not an especially profound lot (See IP’s post “Warnings” for a sample). But every so often, we come across something so random, dumb, or misplaced that you can’t help but smile. So it was for me when we took a brief trip through the Ambassador Apartments and I found this, which I present without further comment.

No, I didn't sit on it.

Since I used “sex” as one of the tags on this post, I wonder how many people will come across this only to be disappointed.